At noon on Saturday, September 19th I walked in the house and Ryan simply stated, “read this message” and the message read “I’m going to call you guys in a couple of hours. Will you be available?” When your PCP sends you a text on a Saturday when you know he wasn’t on call you instantly know something is serious. Otherwise, either A) he wouldn’t have messaged at all or B) stated something like this, “I have the results, nothing major, will discuss on Monday.” As any human in this predicament would have felt, those were the longest two hours of my life. Finally he called. Its a clear conversation that has run thru my mind many times these last seven days.
“I spoke extensively with the radiologist this morning . . . the brain MRI was clear . . . but the neck/chest and the abdomen MRIs showed a bunch of lymph nodes lighting up all over the place . . . I don’t want to be an alarmist but we are looking at two possibilities: a rare virus of some kind or lymphoma. Its more than likely lymphoma. . . need to see an ENT ASAP, a hematologist oncologist. . . cancer center . . . a biopsy as soon as possible. . . this is progressing very rapidly from when I saw you a little over a month ago . . . I’ll network first thing Monday morning to get you an ENT and oncologist asap. . . I’m sorry, this wasn’t what any of us expected. You are generally a healthy man.”
- Enlarged Lymph Nodes: that started at least 4 months ago
- Swollen abdomen: about 3-4 weeks ago I told Ryan I thought his stomach felt harder than normal, we both thought he was just bloated.
- Chest pain or pressure: I thought it was just a cold.
- Shortness of breath or cough: So that wasn’t a cold that has lasted an unusually long while?
- Fever: no real fever with aches, but a few times his skin was hot last weekend when I was in OKC. I thought it was the cold.
- Night sweats: Tonight it hit me. I’m dressed for winter while my hubs is sleeping on his blanket. And this started well over a month ago. And, realizing he hasn’t been sleeping well for a month and he has drenched the bed a few times.
- Feeling full after only a small amount of food: So that’s why we had leftovers after we shared a meal at Ted’s Escondido last Saturday while I was in OKC . . . and he hasn’t been very hungry since he got home.
- Fatigue: Ryan had started a new habit of getting up at 6am every day to walk and eat an apple a day in June . . . all of a sudden in early September that proved to be very difficult for him even though his daily routine hadn’t changed much at that point.