Twenty two months into Ryan’s healing journey and I had to make a conscious decision. Do I want to be vulnerable again or not? Do I expose my thoughts, my feelings, my heart for the world to see? To read? To feel and to JUDGE?
Embrace the journey . . . keep cycling thru. We have embraced the journey of uncovering one stone at a time. While at times we have collapsed timeframes, moved quickly and swiftly to make changes, uncover issues and changed paths when we needed to . . . we also know we are human and we just cannot make a perfect decision every single time. It is impossible for me, for Ryan, and honestly, for YOU.
Shouldn't packing up my husband be a joyous occasion? Is it the fact that I have come to love so many of the nurses, doctors and staff here at CHIPSA Hospital that every goodbye hurts? Is it the fact that we finally get to go home and my heart is happy that the treatments are working? Is it the fact that they have cared for my hubs so well that fear is setting in on what the next 90 days requires of us at home? I imagine its all of the above.